Something to consider

Desiree:

May you please clarify the significance of Gabriel turning 18? You've mentioned it twice now and I'm not sure what you expect to happen when he turns 18 or why it would be significant.

Desiree:

Alright, I've spoken with Gabriel. Based on what he has said to me, and my impression of the conversation, I must respectfully decline your proposal.

Hello, Desiree!

I was going through your old emails, looking for particularly interesting ones to highlight on the website, and I came across this one. Now that some time has passed, and the world has had a chance to see how much of your words you actually follow through on, I'd like to review some of your statements. Please see my comments, inline. I've highlighted the relevant statements to which I am responding.

I disagree. I believe your way of life is wrong - very wrong!

• - You use drugs;
• - you don't provide guidance and direction to your children;
• - you're irresponsible;
• - you blame others for everything that's wrong with your life;
• - you take responsibility for absolutely nothing;
• - you put your desires before the well being of your children;
• - you think that providing the basic necessities of life (food, clothing and shelter) are the only obligations you have to your children;
• - you put your boyfriends before the needs of your children;
• - you tell your children that marijuana is good and that one day they'll learn to appreciate it;
• - and on and on.

So NO, you are absolutely wrong when you say "neither one is wrong". Your way of life is absolutely, unquestionably wrong. It is a sickness and a blight on society (not just you, all trashy people).

You've had 2 and a half years to prove that you're a good mother, yet you've done nothing with that time!

You've had two and a half years to prove that you're a good parent and you've done absolutely nothing! Gabriel has learned nothing from you and his life is in no way enriched or better from the 2.5 years he's spent with you. You think that taking him on vacations to meet your family is significant? You think that will make him a better person? Come on!

Go on then, prove me wrong. How have you improved Gabriel's life? What has he learned from you, other than the kind of women to stay away from? Is he more honest and reliable since staying with you (No, he flakes out of a band performance without notice, he hides his school information when his grades decline, he keeps secrets from both of us). Has his school performance improved? No, it's gotten worse! Does he stick to something that he shows an interest in? No, he fiddles with it for a while then gives up on it. Is he able to do normal day to day things on his own without depending on an adult to hold his hand? No. It seems the only things he's improved on are the things that I teach him and push him to do when he's here.

Am I wrong? Do you have any evidence to the contrary?

You have him covered on your medical and dental insurance and I'm willing to cover all medical costs yet you still don't take him to the doctor or dentist for regular checkups. Does he have any cavities? You have no idea. Is his blind eye developing properly? How should you know?

And you have the nerve to claim you're an "excellent mother"? Bitch! Even MY mother provided me medical and dental care (albeit at the government's expense, but still).

Really? From what I'm told you don't tell him shit. And when you occasionally do share stories with them they're usually made up. I hear about them and he has internet access. It's not hard to verify some of what you tell him.

From what I'm told you rarely give either him or Sage the time of day. And when you do it's almost always about something you want to do and you want to drag him along.

Really? Then what is all this bullshit you've been pulling for the past 3 years? Then why have you repeatedly asked the court to prohibit all communication between him and I. Then why did you withhold my letters to him when I was in custody?

As I've said recently, the only time you're amicable or cooperative is when you believe the court (or some other authority) is going to go completely against you. You sent me this email when you found out I was released from ICE custody and you were sure the court was going to order you to return Gabriel. As soon as you were confident that wasn't going to happen you went right back to being hostile.

Patrick